Skip to main content

For the moments when you feel stuck!

 


I started this year with a lot of enthusiasm...

I remained expectant for the best. I had plans that I wanted to accomplish, and I wasn't going to miss it.

As time went on, things started going off track, and I wasn't having it. I tried all that I could to keep everything in order, but the more I tried, the more I fell apart.

I was losing myself and my focus. 

I was always feeling guilty about things that I did and didn't do. At the end, I broke down. I thought that I just needed to be strong, but I realised that I needed a mind shift, and this shift occurred in the most unique way ever.

I had to learn by letting go.

Strength wasn't the only thing that mattered to me at this moment, and I realise that now.

This write-up isn't to confuse or give you a reason to pity me but to remind you that in moments where you think that all you'll need is your strength and willpower, Abba is calling you to depend on him more.

While I had my plans, and of course planning is good, I had forgotten the part where God chooses the way. I had forgotten to ask for guidance and left on my own. 

I had grown weak, and all I could do was keep pushing by my own effort. I disliked myself for my inadequacies, and with time, everything started looking negative. My judgements became clouded, and I found faults with everything I did.

In one event, I had just chosen to surrender, and for the first time in a while, I felt like I wasn't drowning. I felt free again.

I'm learning to prioritise, to love myself again, and of course I'm learning to build my relationship with Abba again.

Sometimes we get stuck, and it is in those moments that we need God the most.

And so, here's my testimony!

God didn't leave me during all of the moments when I gaslighted myself. He sent his children to encourage me and reach me in more ways than one, and I'm grateful for that.

I somehow found a way to pray, and I was constantly reminded of his goodness.

It is low-key pride when you think that you can do it all by yourself.


Something my mother mentioned: "I don't like the way we are treating God..."

It felt like a lightbulb lit in my head. 

If God were a person, and He is, and you kept treating Him the way you do now... would you be happy with yourself?

For the first time, I saw God as a person with feelings and emotions, not just some ghost or spiritual being. Like someone who was actually excited about talking with his friend or partner and someone who cared sincerely. 

It made me realise that I have a lot of work to do.

How about you?


Sincerely,

Tee 🥰

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Comfort My People, Cry Out To My Flock

 I was having my bible study today, and I came across this Chapter in the book of Isaiah... Tap on the image to listen to my current music playlist while reading What do you want to say? What do they want to hear? There is so much to tell the people of God, so much to tell His children, His flock but only one thing resides in my mind as I write these notes out... I know the thoughts I think towards you, thoughts of good and not of evil to give you and expected end... (Isaiah 55:8) I came across this passage of the bible when I was studying today.  I had questions and needs that I really wanted God to answer and while looking to get the answers to these questions, I found the Lord giving me responsibility and answers for His flock, His children as well. “Comfort, comfort my people,”      says your God. 2  “Speak tenderly to Jerusalem. Tell her that her sad days are gone      and her sins are pardoned. Yes, the  Lord  has pu...
Post a Comment
Read more

Starting All Over Again

7:44pm  Saturday, 16th, November 2024. It's been a long while since I've been up in this space. I just read a post from a few months back and it made me realize that I really miss writing. It's been like what? A few months? A year maybe without consistently writing on the blog. In these few months that have passed though, I have grown, and I am learning constantly to be patient with myself. I've had time to read, develop, and basically build on myself. One thing is certain though, I still have a lot to learn, and this is only the beginning of my life's journey...  Okay, okay... I think I've somewhat started it or maybe gone through a mock phase of life's journey. Hmmm...  I've experienced growth, and I can see what the Lord is doing in my life. I see how intentional God is about each and every one of his children.  Just a head's up to all old and new readers, there's a lot of God in my writeups and I'm unapologetic about it. I love the Lord s...
Post a Comment
Read more